Category Archives: Movies

#186- Fantastic Planet

Quick recap: A race of super huge blue people (Draag) oppress a race of teeny tiny humanoids (Om).

how I feel at the end of the week

how I feel at the end of the week

Fun (?) fact: The ‘Om’ race is a word play on the French word for man, ‘homme’

This movie had a lot going on

tbh, how congress should solve most issues

My thoughts: I’m still choosing movies at random, so it surprised me how many science fiction films I have seen lately,this one being my second French sci-film when I thought there weren’t any. Actually, Fantastic Planet started out in Czechoslovakia but had to be moved to France because Communists aren’t really fans of being made fun of. Go figure.

I full heartedly expected to not like this movie, but within minutes of its opening sequence, I was sucked in. For starters, I had no idea that Fantastic Planet would be animated, and man is it a trippy movie. It kind of reminded me of the Monty Python sequences, but much longer and weirder. The planet that the Draag live on is as strange as it gets, which I loved because the director could’ve used a somewhat familiar landscape but instead just threw in a ton of crazy plants and animals just for the hell of it. There is a scene where the planet is covered in crystals and the Om protagonist, Terr, gets caught in one. His master, Tiwa, simply whistles and the crystals disintegrate. Why crystals? Why whistling? No clue, but it adds to the idea of these humanoids being trapped in such an unfamiliar place.

fantastic-planet

As with most sci-fi and horror films, the best ones are those that can be related back to real world events. In the case of Fantastic Planet, it is literally about the Soviet invasion in Czechoslovakia. It was very easy to see the parallels while watching the movie, which is nice, but not so glaringly obvious that it felt preachy. In the movie, Terr is kept as a pet by the Draag child Tiwa. Through an accident, he is able to absorb the lessons his owner listens to, thus gaining all knowledge he will need later on to defeat the Draag. The ending is an optimistic one: the Om travel to the Strange Planet, an uninhabited place where the Draag send their meditations. While there, they are able to find their weakness and use it to overpower them. The Draag, knowing that they have lost, admit defeat and give the Om their own planet to live on without fear of extermination, named Terr.

Final review: 5/5. I don’t know how popular this film is, but anyone who loves science-fiction should watch it, if they haven’t already. Essential viewing.

Up next: Requiem for a Dream

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#185- 2001: A Space Odyssey

Quick recap: A group of scientists find a monolith buried on the moon and set off toward Jupiter in order to learn more about who might have placed it there. Oh, and there’s a crazy computer that wreaks havoc.

I feel like The Simpsons is just one long 2001 reference I feel like The Simpsons is just one long 2001 reference

Fun (?) fact: Conspiracy theorists (AKA nutjobs) claim that 2001: A Space Odyssey being released so closely to the moon landing is not a coincidence. They (the nutjobs) think that Kubrick directed the landing and used leftover props from his movie.

Ruffles

My thoughts: As I have come to learn with Kubrick films, they are infinitely more enjoyable on the big screen. I had the opportunity to watch 2001: A Space Odyssey at the Drafthouse and it was every bit as awe inspiring as I expected it to be. The Drafthouse played the entire thing-from overture, to intermission, to ending credits so that we, the audience, would have the full effect of the movie. It is a classic for sure, and yet I have no idea what the hell it is all about.

In writing that, though, I am fulfilling what Kubrick wanted. He said in interviews that he never meant ambiguity but he also said that he doesn’t expect anyone to fully ‘get’ it because it is open to interpretation. As pretentious as that sounds, I like that idea. My personal belief is that the movie is about evolution and the monolith represents the next step. Maybe it was set up by aliens? I don’t know. When Dave passes through all the light and ends up in the neoclassical room, I think it’s because he has seen the inside of the monolith, evidently all of time and space. As he progresses in age and finally back to fetus, he represents the ‘birth’ of a new age for Earth, something even more exciting to come. I have no idea if I am right and I don’t really care because that’s just not the point.

A guy next to me evidently hated the whole movie and when he left, scoffed and said that Star Wars was much better, in terms of special effects. I didn’t punch him, although I don’t think anyone would have stopped me. Aside from that guy (who also called the ‘intermission’, the ‘intervention’), I think most people would agree how amazing the whole movie looked. It’s so hard to believe it was shot in the ’60s and I was most impressed by how realistic space travel was portrayed. This is a very visual movie, which sounds redundant, but it’s not. There is very little dialogue throughout the whole thing, but there is so much too look at. It’s almost too much at times and I can see why so many people devote their lives to trying and figuring out all the symbolism.

The main reason the Drafthouse showed 2001: A Space Odyssey was because it is part of their ‘soundtrack’ series, which showcases movies with great soundtracks. So it’s a no brainer to include this film. Every note was put in place perfectly and set the mood for each scene in a way no other film I have seen does. The music heard when the monolith is first seen on the moon is terrifying and for good reason. It sounded like angry bee people or something and I actually felt an uneasiness throughout the entire scene. What also impressed me was how the absence of sound or music could be as equally terrifying. When HAL cuts the oxygen cord from the astronaut and sends him hurtling into space, that scene scared me as much as any other scene in a horror movie could have done.

Final review: 5/5. Go see it if you haven’t yet, but only watch it if you have chance to see it in a theater. I don’t see how a television could do it justice.

Up next: Fantastic Planet

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#184- Gigi

Quick recap: A young girl has foolish ideas of marrying instead of going into the family business of being someone’s mistress

from a scene where a creepy old man sings about how much he loves little girls because they grow up into women he wants to date

from a scene where a creepy old man sings about how much he loves little girls because they grow up into women he wants to date

Fun (?) fact: The cat in the film hated Leslie Caron, who played Gigi and had to be drugged anytime it was in a scene with her. Considering that the cat had nothing whatsoever to do with the plot, I’m not sure why director Vincente Minnelli didn’t just let it go.

I couldn't find a picture for Gigi's cat, but this came up and I liked it better

I couldn’t find a picture for Gigi’s cat, but this came up and I liked it better. That cat looks like it knows something.

My thoughts: Without knowing anything about Gigi, I was fully prepared for it to suck. I ran across a list a few months back that ranked Best Picture winners and Gigi was at the bottom. I assumed from the synopsis Netflix provided  that maybe the writer of the list just didn’t like musicals but 5 minutes in, I realized that no, this movie is in fact terrible and messed up.

Before I get into my rant, and believe me there will be a rant, I’d like to admit that I really loved the musical portion of the movie. The songs were catchy and witty and I found myself humming them the next day. The actors also did a fine job with their characters, although the heavy French accents got on my nerves. It felt like they were over the top, but when I looked up trivia I learned that they were genuine so I’ll give it a pass. The setting and costumes were also wonderful and reminded me of something Disney might put together to showcase Paris long ago.

So, why is this movie so bad? Basically, Gigi, who is a 15 year old girl (very important. Don’t forget this detail) has been born into a family of courtesans. She lives with her grandmother and mother but visits her great aunt once a week for lessons on snagging a rich guy to sleep with. Yeah. Gigi is naturally against the whole thing, but is seen as a girl in need of a makeover so that MEN WILL SLEEP WITH HER. So, in comes Gaston, a rich guy, who likes to hang out with this family but not sleep with any of them. He is particularly fond of Gigi, but sees her more like a child BECAUSE SHE IS. After a weekend with him at the beach, the Great Aunt and grandmother decide that poor Gigi needs to be transformed so Gaston will want to sleep with her. When he sees ‘grownup’ Gigi for the first time, he is repulsed (maybe because she’s 15?) but then sings a song about how he thought she was a baby but seeing her in that dress reminded him that he can totally hit that now. So he does. Gigi isn’t too happy about the whole thing but whatever, that’s the family business. The movie ends with Gaston returning the girl to her grandmother and running away, as the audience thinks he’s a jerk. But then he comes back and announces that he doesn’t want her as a mistress but instead as a wife. Awww. Except not, because she is freaking 15 years old.

There's a scene at the beginning of the film where Gigi and Gaston are playing around and he threatens to spank her. Knowing how this would end only ups the creepiness factor.

There’s a scene at the beginning of the film where Gigi and Gaston are playing around and he threatens to spank her. Knowing how this would end only ups the creepiness factor.

Final review: I’d love to give this movie a 1/5 but I was thoroughly entertained in a car crash sort of way, so let’s go with 3/5 and then never speak of it again.

Up next: Fantastic Planet

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#183- Alphaville

Quick recap: Secret Agent Lemmy Caution has been sent to Alphaville to locate a missing spy and destroy the city’s ruler- a computer named Alpha 60.

That's some good spying going on, Caution

That’s some good spying going on, Caution

Fun (?) fact: Although it is a sci-fi film, director Jean-Luc Godard shot all scenes in real places around Paris and only used conventional firearms.

oooo, super sci-fi!

oooo, super sci-fi!

My thoughts: I had no idea what the hell was going on through most of the movie, and I’m still not sure what the ending was all about. Alphaville is one of those films pretentious people latch on to, but the general public would be bored to tears by it. There are many movies like that, including ones that I personally love, but this one just seemed to be pretentious for the sake of being pretentious. The director is French, after all, so maybe that’s why.

The plot of Alphaville is simple enough: spy comes to kill tyrannical leader who happens to be a supercomputer. A supercomputer in the 1960s, of course. If it was set in modern times, Lemmy Caution might be trying to murder Siri or something similar. The computer is all about logical thinking and holds executions for anyone who shows emotion, which is considered illogical thought. So, pretty straightforward, except that it wasn’t. There are several scenes in which Caution or the computer is talking and I had NO IDEA what they were saying. In looking up trivia for the movie later on, I found that many of the lines came from poetry, but it just sounded like beautiful nonsense in the context of the movie. I was also too caught up in the sci-fi details to really focus on the plot, like trying to figure out if Alphaville is a city or a planet and why it looks so similar to Paris.

Stripped down to its basic premise, Alphaville’s version of reality was quite interesting. Instead of a Bible, citizens use a dictionary, which changes constantly because words like ‘love’ and ‘weep’ are thrown out. People are treated like robots and are expected to behave as such, which also caused confusion for me because I thought the women were all computers. My favorite, scene, if you can call it that, was the depiction of the executions. There are a line of (mostly) men who stand on a diving board and are shot to death. They fall into the water, where a group of synchronized swimmers jump in to retrieve the body. Everyone claps politely and then the next person is brought in. This was the most ‘sci-fi’ part of the film and so messed up because everything looked so familiar. I actually like the idea of using present day locations because it seems as if the world depicted in the movie is not too far off from where we are right now.

Final review: 3/5. Alphaville is also considered noir, which is a weird pairing with the sci-fi genre, but I kind of liked it.

Up next: Gigi

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