#296- Blazing Saddles

Quick recap: A politician is out to destroy a western town so that he can take over their land. He sends them the scariest thing he can think of- a  black guy.

Biden always knew how to cheer Obama up

Fun (?) fact: At the end of the movie, when the crowd pours out of the studio lot, a random guy in a sweater can be seen just standing there. He wasn’t supposed to be in the movie but director Mel Brooks couldn’t get him to leave. He finally gave up, gave the  man waivers to sign and let him stay.

and there’s Trump and Bannon. god, this movie is more topical than I realized

My thoughts: You know what kinds of movies I hate reviewing? Classics. And do you know what is even worse than a classic movie? A comedy classic, which Blazing Saddles definitely is. Add to that the untimely death of Gene Wilder and you’ve got the perfect combination of a film I wouldn’t touch with a 10 foot pole.

So, since I went ahead and lowered expectations for this review accordingly, I can freely say that I didn’t think Blazing Saddles was all that funny. I’m not really sure why. I sound so old saying this but I just don’t think vulgarity for the sake of vulgarity is all that funny. There’s that one scene when Hedley gets so excited he starts humping a statue and I’m sure people fell out of their seats when they saw that, but it just didn’t do anything for me. Trying not to sound to much like a school marm, I will say that the dialogue was snappy and there were some silly moments that made me smile. Not laugh,mind you, but smile. Also, Gene Wilder was wonderful.

I think some of my hesitation from this movie comes from all the racist stuff. I know it’s supposed to be satire but that’s kind of become a big deal again lately and seeing a bunch of white people hating a black guy just wasn’t the humor I wanted. It hit too close to home. It’s not like I can look at those scenes and laugh and think, ‘oh those silly people back then in the west. They were so backwards!’ because that’s literally what’s going on in this country right now. Not everyone, of course, but enough that watching Blazing Saddles just made me uncomfortable. That’s certainly not Mel Brook’s fault and if anything, I applaud him for thinking that we’d be able to watch this movie in 2017 and look at how silly everyone was.

Final review: 3/5. Sorry

Up next: A Night at the Opera

#292- The Graduate

Quick recap: A recent graduate, played by Dustin Hoffman, gets caught between a sweet girl and her mother who he happens to be sleeping with.

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Fun (?) fact: Mrs. Robinson and Benjamin are actually only 6 years apart in real life.

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My thoughts:I know most people love Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate and his fumbling and bumbling is supposed to come off as romantic and adorable, but I was completely turned off anytime he opened his mouth. I don’t know what it is about his voice in this film but it grated on my very last nerve. He just sounded so dopey most of the time, like one of those idiot cartoon villains who, for whatever reason, the mastermind keeps around. I just don’t get the appeal.

 I think this is one of those movies I would’ve enjoyed much more had I first watched it when I was 20 or even 25. As I wasn’t around in 1967, I don’t know what audiences thought about Benjamin and Elaine’s relationship, but I can’t imagine girls wanting something like that. I mean, the guy was having an affair with her mom, then on the first date took her to a strip club which made her so uncomfortable she cried, and then stalked her relentlessly. True love? No. That’s creepy. The affair he had with Mrs. Robinson also creeped me out, so basically this movie is about how to be a predator.

The saving grace for The Graduate is the music. I almost went out that night and bought a Simon and Garfunkel album I loved it so much. I never thought I would be a fan but each song fit so perfectly into each scene. I’d watch it again just for that. Also because I laughed every time the line ‘Hello darkness my old friend’ came on. It makes me want to carry around a boombox and put that song on blast anytime I’m sad so people will truly know what I am feeling.

The dialogue is another strong reason for watching this film. It was very snappy and reminded me of Manhattan several times. It could’ve also been because of the creepy relationships, though.

Final review: 3/5

Up next: The French Connection

#283- Eyes Without a Face

Quick recap: After a horrific accident, a father goes out of his way to try and repair his daughter’s face. It sounds like the sweetest story ever, until it is revealed he is murdering young women and stealing their faces.

there's a face that'll keep you up at night

there’s a face that’ll keep you up at night

Fun (?) fact: In order to get financial backing for the movie, director Georges Franju was advised to leave out the animal torture scenes (to not offend the English), too much blood (to not offend the French) and a mad-scientist character (to not offend the Germans).

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My thoughts: Many of the horror films I’ve watched from other countries do a nice job of building up suspense long after the movie is over. Except for Funny Games, which traumatized me from the very beginning. Eyes Without a Face is no exception. I thought it slow moving while I watched, but there were enough creepy scenes to keep me somewhat occupied. After the movie was over, however, I couldn’t get the image of the girl out of my head and it has stuck with me since then.

Unsettling is the best word I could use to describe the movie. There was never anything downright scary, but instead several scenes that unsettled me. The surgery scene, for example, as the doctor removed the girl’s face to transplant it on to his daughter’s. It was gruesome, but not terrifying. And then end scene when the doctor gets what’s coming to him was also gross but not scary. All the scenes in between, though, especially anything to do with the main character and her Mask of Gloom bothered me. She was very sweet and didn’t ask for any of this, but why did she have to look so creepy with the long, flowing night gowns? And whoever decided that the mask was an improvement over her disfigured face was out of their mind.

As has been the unofficial theme of HorrorFest this year, I had trouble trying to figure out exactly what I was supposed to fear. The doctor was evil, murdering pretty girls just for their faces, but that didn’t particularly scare me. Or maybe it was the girl herself, who, as I just described, creeped me out, but only because of the mask,not because of who she was. I can appreciate that my knowledge of the horror genre has increased, but it also makes me a little sad that it’s harder to find good movies that just scare me, without any rhyme or reason. Maybe one will pop up here next year, because this year has been a bit of a dud.

Final review: 3/5. The girl wasn’t enough for a higher rating, although the movie itself wasn’t bad overall

Up next: the last film of HorrorFest!

#278- The Fly

Quick recap: National treasure Jeff Goldblum plays Sam Brundle, an eccentric scientist who accidentally turns himself into a human-fly hybrid.

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Fun (?) fact: In a deleted scene, Brundle fuses together a cat and baboon and is so disgusted with the creation, beats the animal to death with a pipe. Producer Stuart Cornfeld said, ‘If you beat an animal to death, even a monkey-cat, your audience is not gonna be interested in your problems anymore.’

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National treasure, you guys

My thoughts: I’ve made some really bad choices when it comes to guys I’ve dated, but at the very least I can say I’ve never fallen for an eccentric scientist who fuses his DNA with a fly and then impregnates me with his Maybe Fly Spawn. I’m a mess, but not Geena Davis in The Fly kind of a mess. So, there’s that inspiration.

I was warned by my husband that his movie was super gross and I should maybe rethink watching it. Boy, was he right! It didn’t start off disgusting, and I got kind of bored after awhile with the build up. But then, there was a scene where Brundle peeled off his fingernails and I almost lost it. It all went downhill from there. The Fly didn’t terrify me, but it stuck with me in a way most movies won’t. Even now, almost a week after watching it, I’ll randomly think of the scene where Brundle vomits on his food to liquify it and it will make me queasy. In that sense, The Fly is a perfect example of a horror film.

Vincent Price, who was in the original Fly loved the remake but thought it went a little too far at the end. Totally agreed. I think a good stopping point would’ve been the nightmare of giving birth to the Fly Spawn or when BrundleFly detailed how he ate his food. But all that stuff of him trying to kill the ex-boyfriend and then fusing himself with the teleporter was just over the top for me. I still felt sorry for him in a way, kind of, but I would’ve had no problems killing that mess at the end. And can we talk for just a second about Geena Davis’ character, Veronica? That girl has issues. She dated a jerk of a guy and then immediately fell for this eccentric weirdo. I mean, I guess he was cute, but him drunkenly teleporting himself because he was jealous would’ve been it for me. But not for Veronica. She kept coming by, even when he had completely turned insane and terrifying. She couldn’t have seen this coming but geez, girl, get some standards.

The Cronenberg Universe in Rick and Morty makes so much more sense now

The Cronenberg Universe in Rick and Morty makes so much more sense now

Final review: 3/5. I wavered on this one, almost giving it a 4 but I’ll be too scarred to eat donuts for quite awhile.

Up next: HORRORFEST